turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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