okay pat passed out under dana's car
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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