He is such a slut. More and more my type.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Randomize
