I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize