hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
Buhtt sex?
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
We have started to decorate penises.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
