i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
