Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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