It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
