It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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