Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Randomize
