im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Do vagina's smell?
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Randomize
