what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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