sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize