Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
