it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
