you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
