I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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