It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
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Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
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I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
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