Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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