onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize