i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
