what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
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we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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