I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
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A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
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I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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