If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
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