I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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