May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
