I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Randomize
