Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?