i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
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I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
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We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.