how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Randomize
