I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
third nipple confirmed
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
