i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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