he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
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