You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
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