You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
