my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Randomize