my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
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