You really coming over, don't trick.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
