Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
