Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
