You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Randomize
