Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
