You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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