I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
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I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
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We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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