Its about making memories worth repressing
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Houston, we have a blender
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
