eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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