maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
he wants to bone in the snuggie
reminds me of losing my job
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot