I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
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just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
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You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
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