So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
My Higher Power is John Stamos
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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