went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
