i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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