I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
